William Borden


COCKTAILS, DINNER

Finalist, Senior Barn Play Project, Kansas City, MO

COCKTAILS, DINNER

Should Sally and Arnie tell their spouses about their affair? Or will it spoil dinner? Should Bob and Bella confess their affair? And what's for dessert? 2m, 2f. 25 min.


An excerpt...

ARNIE
Are we going to tell them?

SALLY
When we're both sick?

ARNIE
We agreed we'd tell them tonight.

SALLY
Yes, but now we have this cough. I think I'm getting a fever.

ARNIE
They're bound to figure it out.

SALLY
Just because we both have colds? Everybody has a cold!

ARNIE
We keep putting it off.

SALLY
For good reason!

ARNIE
It's not a good reason.

SALLY
Pleasure is a good reason. Love is a good reason. Our affair, our beautiful affair, is a good reason.

ARNIE
We're both psychologists. We deal with honesty, and we're not being honest.

SALLY
I regard this as a matter of confidentiality. I don't tell Bob about my patients. Why should I tell him about my lover?

ARNIE
I can't take it anymore! I can't get rid of my hives. I can't sleep. I've got athlete's foot.

SALLY
What if they want divorces?

ARNIE
They're reasonable people.

SALLY
I love Bob.

ARNIE
I love Bella.

SALLY
I love you.

ARNIE
I love you.

SALLY
Life is so bewildering!

ARNIE
Bella might want a separation. She might not feel like sharing the bed with me.

SALLY
What'll you do then?

ARNIE
I thought maybe I could sleep with you.

SALLY
With me and Bob?

ARNIE
If Bob doesn't want to sleep with you.

SALLY
It'll be a mess, I know it will.

Selected Works

FULL-LENGTH PLAYS
DON'T DANCE ME OUTSIDE
Butch, a novelist, and Ardis, an architect, begin an affair. They reveal their pasts, fantasize their future, call their spouses, fight, risk, and love.
MANY WORLDS
Maggie has to tell Axel that she has terminal cancer, as Axel explains the "Many Worlds" theory of quantum physics, and from time to time "other worlds" open up, some involving Maggie's husband.
TAP DANCING ACROSS THE UNIVERSE
A college professor who wants to run away from home gets his chance when he and his wife are visited by a would-be shaman, a runaway mother, and a hippy.
MEET AGAIN
A romantic comedy that takes a playful, sexy look at reincarnation. "Insightful and delightfully wacky," Jason Fogelson, New York Shakespeare Festival.
GOURMET LOVE
How long can Sally and Arnie keep their affair from their spouses, who are having an affair of their own?
BLUEST REASON
Lewis and Clark air their conflicts and hire a pregnant guide.
TEN-MINUTE PLAYS
GUNNING FOR LIFE
An old man's lust for life confronts his terminal cancer in an unusual comedy with a poignant ending.
DUET FOR VIRTUAL PARTICLES
A man wonders if he's an alien. A woman wonders if she's too tall.
DIRTY LAUNDRY
A woman wearing only a raincoat gives a would-be writer something to write about.
QUARKS
A man and a woman meet at a singles bar. His "Take off your panties," gets unexpected results.
SOMETHING LIGHTER
A couple finalize their divorce. Or do they?
THE BLUES STREET JAZZ CLUB REHEARSES
The loves of five would-be musicians intertwine like strands of music, improvised and unpredictable.
LUNCH
Should Bob and Bella tell their spouses they know their spouses are having an affair?
RECOGNITION
Two high school sweethearts, with their spouses, meet for lunch after 25 years.
HANGMAN
A condemned man must build his own gallows. He helps his executioner write a poem.
ONE EVENING IN PRAGUE
Albert Einstein, an up-and-coming physicist, meets Franz Kafka, a little-known author, .
FALLING
The thoughts of a Jew and a Muslim who fell from the World Trade Center the morning of September 11, 2001.
MUSE
Cal, plagued by writer's block, calls for a muse. He gets Ron.
THAT GUY FROM THE BERGMAN FILM
It may be Cassy's last day, but she hasn't lost her sense of humor as her family gathers around.
THE ALIEN HYPOTHESIS
If Larry is an alien, as he suspects, why haven't the aliens told him?
JUMPING
A man and a woman rejected by love fall in love before one jumps into the ice-covered Mississippi and the other jumps into the praxis of politics.
LEDGE
Mary could jump and end it all if Tom, who also wants to jump, would get out of her way.
ONE-ACT PLAYS
GARAGE SALE
Warren's starting over. He's selling everything.
PATRIOTS
Two men talking--terrorists or undercover agents?
I WANT TO BE AN INDIAN
A white liberal who wants to be an Indian gets his chance.
APPLES
A deconstructed Garden of Eden where Adam finds Lilith, and Eve and Satan reach an understanding.
COCKTAILS, DINNER
Should Sally and Arnie tell their spouses about their affair? Or will it spoil dinner?
IT'S SO WOWOO
Larry wonders if he's an alien. If he is an alien, why haven't the other aliens told him?
HERE TODAY, GONE TOMORROW
A teenager wonders if a homeless man is really Jesus.
AFFAIRS OF RECKLESS HONOR
Six women re-enact the duels of an earlier age

Quick Links

Find Authors